Freeeeeeeeee!!!

 

Ah there's nothing like the feeling of freedom after you've been trapped for a long time in a dark place. That dark place was for me the real-estate industry, which engulfed the past month of my life, six long days a week, becoming seven even!

on saturday i threw in the towel, explaining to my boss that i could feel it in my heart that it wasn't the right path for me. i had somehow imagined a future as a real-estate agent and busted my guts to get the job. i tried my best at doing the job well too... but i was like a fish out of water. or oil trying to mix with water, or something along those lines, you get my gist. the whole vibe repelled me.

there's a good reason people hate real estate agents. because they're salesmen! always hunting for the kill. and to be good at it you must master the arts of trickery, pretence, manipulation and intimidation. its psychology at its most cunning and you don't leave it at work.. it creeps around, follows you home...

i found myself befriending neighbours in the lift, purely to see if they were thinking of selling their flats; leaving shortbread on an old ladies doorstep, of course with the note 'i would love to help you sell your home'..; buying get well cards for strangers; hand delivering letters, all with the aim to reel people in. each day i sat on the phone and called 100 people from my database, hunting for appraisals. you know those infuriating indian telemarketers that call you every day? i now feel their pain.... 'dont take it personally' my colleagues told me. i tried different tactics, different voice tones, different diaologues..... but people know when you want something, and no matter how much you try to shake it off, a harsh rebuke and a hang-up in the face is negative energy.

i don't know if i became someone else in that month or if i just suppressed the good parts of my personality... but the whole thing definitely felt like a long morbid, soulless dream, from which i'm very glad to have woken.

though i'm now unemployed again, i feel reborn, liberated, energized, back to my bubbly self, with a new-found joy for life! i'm flooded with creative inspiration and motivation! maybe it was a good thing, experiencing the loathsome world of corporate sales, because it's kicked me back on track again!

my mum discovered a fantastic sounding course called 'professional photo, film, tv and personal stylist's' course, which i've enrolled in for next month! they say there's a huge demand for stylists and guarantee to find you your first job in the industry... i can see myself as a costume stylist for film or theatre. i would love that in fact!

here's to a new chapter! and to feeling like myself again!

:o)