the old conundrum

my favourite wes anderson film

i've hit the old 'what am i gonna do with my life' wall again. it happens every time im in a situation (like this) where i have too much time on my hands to think about my future...

when i was at university i lived in a share house with two very good girl friends of mine, jeanette and liz. they both knew exactly what they wanted to be from first year. jeanette wanted to be a psychologist and liz wanted to be an art curator. i had no idea, so of course, i did an arts degree and just picked subjects that seemed interesting slash easy. 

ten years later, jeanette's doing groundbreaking research in clinical depression and is about to move to london where she'll work as a psychologist and liz is the executive assistant to the dean of RMIT university. (its not art curation but its a good job!)... 

although my problem of lack of direction, or perhaps of superfluous directions, has meant i've travelled the world and gained lots of different work experience from english teaching to bartending, what troubles me is that i'm nearly 30 and i still don't have a career.....and it feels like its getting a bit late to find one!  

i know this is a classic complaint and normally when other people express similar predicaments i always brush them off with 'ah, doesn't matter, the most interesting people don't know what they're doing with their lives, its good to experiment, you'll discover your passion when you're ready'...etc. but the truth is i've probably been trying to convince myself.

its not that i'm not ambitious. i have loads of dreams. for example i'd love to make my own movies or even to work on a wes anderson or sofia coppola film set. but when jerry forces me to do an internet search on available entry-level jobs in the film industry, its true there aren't many paid ones.....

so i guess ill just bludge around until i find the next shit-kicking job to pay the bills and hope that one day someone's gonna come up to me and say 'hey, you're way too good for this job, you're wasting all your potential! i know what the best job in the world is and you'd be perfect for it!'.....  any of you....? 

;o)